Dysfunctional outdoor wedding demands guests pay $2 for water, serves wedding cake without plates or utensils: 'I watched as people walked around holding dessert in their hands.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jul 25, 2025 8:00 AM EDT

A perfect wedding is something that can be paid for. You can't always control exactly what your wedding guests do, but if you spend enough money, you can at least control the food being served, the music being played at the reception, and the pastor who is joining you in holy matrimony. If you have a wedding in an expensive wedding venue, it's more likely to go smoothly than if your aunt with no event-planning experience threw you a last-minute wedding in her backyard. It's a sad reality that more cash can make problems go away, and if you're going to throw a $200 wedding, chances are it's going to feel like a $200 wedding to your guests. But maybe you don't care about that as a wedding guest! Maybe you want to watch your closest relations and friends get hitched, and you don't care if the wedding is a "good wedding" by the standards of Town & Country magazine. 

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  • This wedding guest clearly doesn't care that much about the bride and groom at the wedding she attended. Because of that, she's able to be brutally honest about the quality of said wedding without any self-censoring. I'll let her speak for herself, but in short, it was not a “good wedding” by any standards.

  • 01

    I had to pay for WATER. Also- surprise! Cash-only with ZERO communication beforehand. This was just the tip of the iceberg.

    I attended a disaster of a wedding this evening. From start to not- even-finish because I left early, it was a mess. I knew nothing coming into this wedding aside from the time and place. That was the only information given on the invitation, and there was no wedding website to get more information. Turns out, it was an
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 02
    outdoor wedding on a humid 95° and sunny afternoon (thought it was indoor because I looked up the venue). People were in shorts, tees, and slip-ons, and others were in floor-length gowns. One lady was in a full white dress.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 03
    Ceremony started, at least I thought. I couldn't hear much over the 8 children there that screamed through the entire thing. Parents, of course, didn't intervene. The ceremony went fairly smooth, although the personal vows were oddly disturbing. Pronounce you husband and wife- YAY, done.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 04
    Cheezburger Image 10533878272
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 05
    Cocktail hour starts. No direction on what to do, so I follow the herd to the bar line. At this point, I am drowning in my own sweat, and all I want is water. I'm not paying attention to the people in front of me because I'm busy trying to fight off flies. My turn in line and I ask for water. "You got
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 06
    it, $2." I look up and I see the sign. No free beverages- period. Not even water. I take a second to internalize and pull out my card. The man says, "Oh I'm so sorry, we operate with cash-only." Thank GOD I had some cash in my purse from a FB Marketplace sale.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 07
    I sit and wait for dinner. I have little interest in socializing because I feel sick from the heat. Eventually, dinner starts. Tables are dismissed as usual, and I get to the buffet line. This looks like such homey food, yum! Then I realize it is in fact, homemade. No problem, who doesn't love a home cooked meal? Me when
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 08
    there's FLIES ALL OVER THE FOOD. Seriously, all up in the food. I take the smallest amount possible to be polite. I was so hungry and desperate that I did take a few bites. Within hours, I was creating jobs for local plumbers.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 09
    Cheezburger Image 10533879808
    via Philip Veater

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 10
    I sit and wait some more. I barely know bride and groom (EDIT: I knew the bride about 4 years ago, but we were more acquaintances, and I went to the same school as the groom, not sure why I made the list but there were a lot of people there), let alone anyone else there. Next, dessert! Can't mess up dessert, right?
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 11
    Wrong. So wrong. Flies on the dessert, as expected by now. But how am I supposed to eat the dessert? There are no plates, napkins, forks, nothing. The buffet equipment has been cleared. So I watched as people walked around holding dessert in their hands.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 12
    All throughout this time- drunken family drama, kids still screaming and making ginormous messes.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 13
    Next was speeches. At this point, just start taking notes for this post. 6 speeches in total, one of them actually good! Sweet, heartfelt, funny. I forgot where I was for a second. The rest... roasts, angry bride, brother started a fight with the groom.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 14
    And I mean a literal fight. I couldn't hear what it was about above the screaming kids, and the groom's lack of front teeth. All I gathered was that it had something to do with the bride. The fight got taken to the lawn, and when people gathered to assist, I slipped out and came home.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 15
    I truly don't feel like this was real life. Like this had to be a practical joke, right?? I may politely decline invitations I have no information about moving forward.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 16
    Cheezburger Image 10533880064
    via erica steeves

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 17
    DeadLettersSociety My turn in line and I ask for water. "You got it, $2." I look up and I see the sign. No free beverages- period. Not even water. There's always something about this type of thing that makes me mad. It just feels so bleak when there's costs for water. Regardless of how people try to justify it, with there being labour costs (like a waiter/ bartender using a tap to put it in a glass) or whether it
    via u/DeadLettersSociety
  • 18
    be a bottle of water (material and factory costs), it just bothers me. I feel like water is something that should be free or as cheap as possible. $2 a serving of water is not cheap. Even if it's in a bottle. It's just trying to charge exorbitant costs for it. (Just my opinion and feelings on the matter, though.)
    via u/DeadLettersSociety
  • 19
    According-Citron-825 OP I truly am an easy going guest. I have zero issue with cash bars, I will very rarely complain about the choices a couple made to celebrate their big day. But at a wedding in the de d of summer, you gotta provide some kind of beverage to your guests
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 20
    OdangoAtamaOodles Well, I'm going to go out on a limb, and say to be fair, if I was a kid attending that kind of outdoor ceremony in those conditions, I'd be screaming the entire time too. murder
    via u/OdangoAtamaOodles
  • 21
    According-Citron-825 OP Honestly, so fair. I was is screaming on the inside.
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 22
    PmpsWndbg In the kids vs. kid-free event debate, it IS kind of shocking how people never consider... how do the kids feel about "sitting" through this boring- a ceremony?
    via u/PmpsWndbg
  • 23
    VivianDiane This wasn't a wedding. It was a survival challenge.
    via u/VivianDiane
  • 24
    Frosty-Turnover-1814 I need to know more about the vows OP I laughed out loud at people crrying dessert in their hands
    via u/Frosty-Turnover-1814
  • 25
    According-Citron-825 OP The dessert truly made was the comedic turning point for me. The VOWS, don't get me started I NEVER want to yuck someone's yum for their wedding, but these was truly something else. Think Twilight movies level of "I can't breathe without you," and lots of "no one understands me" and "I'm so damaged."
    via u/According-Citron-825
  • 26
    Catsdrinkingbeer Why would you attend a wedding for 2 people you barely know, and apparently dislike, and don't know anyone else at the wedding? Why would you bother sticking around to stay polite?
    via u/Catsdrinkingbeer
  • 27
    According-Citron-825 OP Because I am the world's biggest people pleaser. I recognized a few other people but didn't really know them. As ridiculous as it sounds, leaving early was actually an accomplishment for myself because I never just get up and leave
    via u/According-Citron-825

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outdoors wedding drama wedding fail wedding cakes water outdoor wedding guests outdoor wedding desserts wedding wedding cake dessert weddings money
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